i was going to be a little bit more concerned about the world at large today but an early morning conversation with an acquaintance changed all that. this was a girl i haven't seen in about a year and a half or may be more. i spotted her as she made her way through the crowd of people getting on the tube at baker street. she said, "hello, how are you? you look well. you look like you've put on some weight. that's good."

first rule of fight club - do not talk about fight club. likewise, first rule of feminine banter - do not talk about weight or make any reference to the other person's body shape or tell them that they 'look tired'. this is essential in creating a forum for a peaceful chat. if you break this rule, you will generally be seen as the proverbial female dog by the other female person. of course, if you're a man and you're breaching the rules, you will either be ignored or thoroughly beaten up by even the most smallest of ladies.

but back to what i was getting at. what is it about weight that makes women generally quite sensitive to comments about it? i don't know, but i suspect my weight would be what doctors would consider to be a healthy weight. even so, i felt very self-conscious and i am going to muster all the energy and will power i have to go to the gym later. and can i just point out that i know that i've put on more weight, thank you very much? suddenly, i understand what causes eating disorders. it doesn't have much to do with logical arguments about whether you are a healthy weight or not. the suggestion that i've put on weight from a person outside my normal circle was something that caught me unawares, and i had a fleeting image of myself as an ugly person with an ugly body.

in an attempt to make this posting sound a little bit less self-obsessed, i add this to the pile:

women, aren't we meant to support each other as sisters? i am not trying to reduce the arguments of those political feminists to that mainly revolving around self-image, but given that we live in a society which is (a) still dominated by men (b) still treating women as sexual objects, shouldn't the women themselves not be involved in this process of objectifying women by kindly not mentioning stuff like this to each other?