The Kid

T. has an absolutely adorable child of around two years old. Now, when I say 'adorable' in the context of a child, I am not saying it lightly. I have high standards in judging children and their adorability - it is simply not true that all children are sweet and cute. Some children are, like the rest of us, ugly. It's a fact.

The Kid is just so cute I have offered to adopt her pretty much every time I've met with her mother. She enjoys hip hop, has learned to 'gimme five' (she slaps everyone's hands with her own) and loves running around (literally) shopping malls with me, stopping to slam herself against shop displays (OK, I taught her that one, but you know, it's pretty cool that she does it). Best of all, she calmly peed on her mother's jeans while having high tea with us at Island Shangri-La, thus giving us hope that even stiff formal teas can be livened up with a bit of pissing around.
"So you still think marriage is about love?" T. asked as she changed The Kid's nappy - unnecessarily, I think, since The Kid had managed to give herself a wedgie and pee without wetting the thing. T.'s husband grinned.
"I do," A. said defiantly.
"Well, you have the product of love right there, sweetheart," I said, pointing to The Kid, who was happily staring at the coloured wall hangings while her mother changed her trousers. T. and her husband laughed but A. was slightly horrified.
"You are so cynical," A. said.
"No I'm not," I said, "I'm just saying, once Cinderella gets happily married, they don't mention that she and her Prince Charming had to think about their children's health insurance or education costs."
"Who says I want to have children? Can't people just get married and not have children?" A. asked.
"Well you say that now, but I'll bet you'll have five kids once you're married," I teased.

I wouldn't say I'm cynical about having children. In fact, I think it's better to be aware of what you are getting yourself into, rather than have children willy nilly - if it can be said that you have children 'willy nilly', that is. I told T. that I can say The Kid is cute, a work of art, and that I would like to adopt her and mean all of it 100 per cent. , without any resentment, because she is not mine. T. agreed.
"There are some days when I want to strangle her," she joked.