How I started my s_ex education

The first time I had any idea about what se_xual reproduction means was when I read the Children's Encyclopaedia Britannica at age seven. There was a short terse paragraph about male and femal se_xual organs followed by pictures (not photos) of them (why do they always show them both dissected? It's not as if we ever get to see them in that manner unless you train to be an X-ray technician) and a foetus inside a womb. So I thought I'd got the hang of it.

Then at age eight I had an argument with my little sister. She had written in her diary, 'I don't want to be a mum because that would mean I would have to have a baby and it would hurt to have a baby come out of your belly button'. I pointed out that babies don't come out of your belly button, but I had no idea where else they would come out of. So I had to go to my mother.
"Mum, babies don't come out of your belly button, do they?"
My mother must have been somewhat disconcerted but she managed to reply,"No, they don't."
"Where do they come from then?" I asked, then said - probably saving the day - "oh never mind, I'll look it up in the Encyclopaedia."

At ten years old, my sister and I bought a book which described in comic-style illustration how boys and girls 'change' when they get to a certain age. My mother thought it was a comic book and said nothing about it. She did get extremely upset however, when she realised that I had read 'Forever' by Judy Blume and, even worse, some of her Jeffrey Archer novels.
"Did you read this?" she demanded to know, waving around 'The Prodigal Daughter' in the air.
"Yes," I admitted, not quite sure what was wrong with having read the book. My mother sighed.
"J-A, if you read my adult books, there won't be anything for me to read, OK? Don't read my books please," she said. I nodded - I had finished reading the whole book, anyway. My father wasn't so lenient about the Judy Blume, however, and banned me from borrowing any more books from my friend Kay. He said, "These books are not suitable for little children like you."
So I ended up reading Kay's books at her house instead of bringing them home.

By the time we had our se_x education at school, I had gone through something like forty-odd books on teen angst and se_xual trysts. I was twelve. I sat through the class in extreme anticipation - I wanted to know if what I had imagined about everything was right. It was a let down when I realised the two lady teachers taking the class were not interested in telling us about how it is that boys and girls become attracted to each other - at that age at school, the girls and boys simply did not speak to each other except to pull hair, pick fights and generally squabble. For that, I had to wait to meet my first boyfriend.

* This post was inspired by Debra's post on her own daughter's se_x ed.
** The funny spelling of the words is meant to stop this post from attracting freaks who are looking for online porn. Piss off if you are one of them. Shoo.